


lone ranger

by triforced



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Humor, M/M, dumb boys, the worst piggyback ride possibly ever
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-23
Updated: 2016-07-23
Packaged: 2018-07-26 06:22:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,974
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7563676
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/triforced/pseuds/triforced
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>And just like that it's on, it's so on and Kageyama can't even be embarrassed about how predictable he is, whatever, who cares, his jaw is set and he's determined, stalking toward Hinata with his fists balled at his sides while Hinata grins at him smugly.</p>
            </blockquote>





	lone ranger

"Come on, Kageyama."

Kageyama gives him a flat look. "No." Usually, he's on board with most of Hinata's weirder suggestions, but there are limits.

Undeterred, Hinata does this awkward seal-clap behind his back, except his hands don't really connect so it kinda looks like he's flapping his arms around. He bends over a bit more, as if that'll make Kageyama change his mind or something. "Get over here, come on, I wanna run."

Why hasn't Kageyama left yet. That's what he wants to know. Why hasn't he turned on his heel and stalked off already. This is so stupid. He has no idea why he does half the things he does as soon as Hinata is involved, and he's kind of afraid to think on it too hard because he might learn stuff about himself he'd rather just stay ignorant of. "So quit wasting time and go run, dumbass."

"What, are you chicken?" Hinata peers at him over his shoulder, gives him a look that screams, wow, you're a loser. "Scared I'll drop you? I bet I'm way stronger than you are, Kageyama."

And just like that it's on, it's so on and Kageyama can't even be embarrassed about how predictable he is, whatever, who cares, his jaw is set and he's determined, stalking toward Hinata with his fists balled at his sides while Hinata grins at him smugly. God, he hates Hinata so much sometimes - not _hate_ hates, not even close, but the point still stands.

Hinata sets his feet, bends his knees, wiggles his fingers as if to say, yeah, let's do this, bring it - he says it all out loud, too, he's Hinata, of course he does.

This might be one of the stupidest things Kageyama's ever done, and he's done a lot of stupid things. Because Hinata. Scowling, his cheeks slightly pink, Kageyama decides he is not about to make this easy for Hinata; in fact, he is about to make this the opposite of easy for Hinata, so with that in mind, he flings himself forward, allows his body to become a dead weight draped over Hinata's back.

The breath leaves Hinata's lungs in a _whoosh_ , much to Kageyama's grim satisfaction. He stumbles to one side, rushes to hook his arms around Kageyama's legs and hoist him up before Kageyama slides off. Somehow, Hinata manages to do it, after a lot of huffing and puffing and fancy footwork that is not fancy in the slightest. He crows his triumph for maybe a second or two and then he groans. "Geez, you weigh like a million pounds, how much do you _eat_?"

Kageyama responds by digging his knuckles into the crown of Hinata's head, earning a yelp for his effort. "I thought you said you were stronger than me." He replaces his knuckles with his chin, because that is how short Hinata is, and lets his arms hang loose over Hinata's shoulders. They probably look like a pair of complete idiots. Kageyama feels like a complete idiot, but he's committed now; there's no way he's gonna be the first to bow out. "You're just a bunch of hot air."

"Shut up, I haven't dropped you yet, have I?" Hinata grouses. He takes a few tentative steps away from the gym, pauses, takes a few more, testing out their combined weight - that he bears the brunt of. Kageyama is not going to help him even a little, it isn't his fault Hinata got this incredibly dumb notion in his head. Let him struggle, it serves him right. Though, to be honest, he is more than a tiny bit impressed. Hinata surprises him all the time, even if they spend almost every day together.

\- They spend almost every day together. He has a feeling there's a hidden message in there somewhere that maybe isn't hidden, maybe is actually a glowing neon sign that reads NOT NORMAL. But whatever, they're teammates, they are both serious about volleyball and nobody pushes Kageyama on the court quite the way Hinata does. (Off the court, too, even.) And okay, he prefers Hinata's company over most people because they _get_ each other and Hinata doesn't expect him to be anybody but himself - sure, he has opinions, loud ones, but Kageyama has opinions about Hinata, too, so it all evens out, to a degree. (They fight a lot.)

He bumps Hinata with his chin. "Hurry up and run already. Or admit you can't. Why did you even want to do this, you're such a moron."

"You're the biggest moron," Hinata shoots back, jostling Kageyama on purpose. He's bent almost double now, breath coming out in puffs, face red from exertion, but he keeps moving resolutely, step after step. "I just wanted to, okay, I wanted to see if I could, and I can, shut your face, Kageyama, I so can." He grips on to Kageyama's thighs, digs his fingers in. "All the way to the stoplight, watch me - you better not fall off!"

Kageyama feels a strange tingle in his gut because of where Hinata is touching him, his hands are pretty far up Kageyama's thighs and - it's weird, it's so weird, he picked a terrible time to get all flustered about this, Hinata is the literal worst.

"If I do, it's your fault - " he grumbles, the tingly feeling morphing into a tingly beast that has a mind of its own, but then Hinata is running, barreling down the sidewalk with a burst of speed that his tiny, athletic body is suited for, his voice raised in a cross between whoop and battle cry.

Holy _shit_. On instinct, Kageyama wraps his arms around Hinata, clings for dear life without any shame because it will suck so much if he does fall off, and - well, despite the fact that what they're doing right now has disaster written all over it, deep down, Kageyama is sort of (very) exhilarated. Tingly, but exhilarated.

Also, he's glad the school is mostly empty and the rest of the team has gone home, so none of them are seeing this. He doesn't want to hear any of the commentary, especially from Tsukishima. Screw that guy.

Hinata makes it to the entrance of the school grounds and never flags once, though Kageyama hears him wheeze, can tell Hinata's arms are starting to tremble. Where does he get his energy from, Kageyama wonders - but he's grateful for it, they wouldn't pull off half their plays during matches if it weren't for that boundless energy. Another reason why he likes Hinata, among many reasons why he likes Hinata.

\- Seriously, what is going on with him today. (What is going on with him every day, is the better question.)

"Almost there," Hinata calls as he passes through the gate and skids around the corner. Kageyama latches on tighter. "You totally owe me dinner tomorrow, I'm gonna make you buy me a ton of expensive stuff." Practically each word is punctuated by a gasp.

Kageyama's eyebrow twitches; he's cranky all of a sudden. Well. More cranky than usual. "I never agreed to any of that!"

"You did when you hopped on!"

"I wouldn't have if you said so, and you didn't!" He would have. Which is neither here nor there.

"No takebacks, Kageyama - "

And then Hinata trips over a patch of uneven sidewalk, and Kageyama sees his life flash before his eyes.

His first thought is, But what about volleyball.

His second thought is, I knew this was a stupid idea.

His third thought is, Maybe I should've kissed Hinata before I died.

His fourth, fifth, sixth thoughts are, What.

When the fog clears, he blinks up at the dusky sky. He is flat on his back, arms and legs akimbo, his body a solid ache. Hinata had landed behind him, on his stomach; he knows this because he feels Hinata's breath against his head, ruffling his hair. Hinata, who is way too close, overwhelmingly close, and that's new. Hinata's closeness has never bothered him before. If Kageyama weren't so half-dead, he'd scramble away and try to pass it off as a bug up his shirt. He tells himself, breathe, go on and breathe, don't make any sudden movements, you are in the danger zone and there is a strong possibility you will become collateral damage. He breathes through his nose, deeply.

"Hey, Kageyama," Hinata croaks after a while.

Kageyama closes his eyes. "Yeah?"

"Roll over."

"Shut up, leave me alone, I'm sore and I hate you." The sore part is true.

Hinata blows a stream of air at his head, and Kageyama has the distinct impression that Hinata's face is a lot closer than he initially thought. "Just do it. Please?"

Kageyama ignores him. Breathes through his nose, deeply. He should've stayed in bed today, is what he should've done.

"Come oooooon, I said please. I'll buy dinner tomorrow, okay? Whatever you want." There's a pause. "Maybe not whatever you want, I'm sorta broke, but something really good."

Typical Hinata. So, so typical. Kageyama presses the heels of his hands against his eyes, unsure of what he means to accomplish by doing so. When he's had enough of that, he lets out an irritated huff. And then he rolls over, every limb protesting. Hinata's face is _right there_. Heat pools in Kageyama's cheeks, his heart beats crazily, he wants to throw himself off a bridge, at least then he won't have to deal with the awful thoughts in his awful head, he really is spending too much time with Hinata, that's the problem. He needs to stop looking at Hinata's mouth. "You're strong," he blurts out, and he has no idea why he said it. "I mean, for a dumbass, you're pretty strong, I guess."

Hinata's eyes light up. He flashes a toothy grin and Kageyama needs to stop looking at his mouth, Hinata's mouth is bad for his health. "I told you, didn't I tell you? Listen to me next time, I know what I'm talking about." Kageyama's ready to snap something at him but then Hinata's expression changes and the words die in his throat. Hinata looks like he's trying to laser through Kageyama's head. The inside of Kageyama's head is the worst place for Hinata to be right now. "Kageyama."

"What," Kageyama says, louder than he means to.

They are on the sidewalk, they are sprawled out on their stomachs on the sidewalk. Why.

Hinata says, casually, "If you're gonna stare at my mouth, you should do something with it."

Kageyama thinks the fall actually did kill him. It killed him, he is dead. He licks his lips. His eyes, his horrible traitor eyes, keep straying to Hinata's mouth and he has to forcibly haul them up each time. "How about I bite you, how about that." Uh. "I'll chew your lip off, Hinata, get your stupid face away from me." Kageyama wants to stuff his fist in his own mouth and scream.

Especially when Hinata stretches his neck forward, shoves his face _closer_. "No you won't, don't be such a weirdo." He raises his eyebrows.

"You're the werido saying weird things out of nowhere," Kageyama blusters, dizzy with the proximity of Hinata's face and Hinata's mouth and - fuck it, he is too sore, too frustrated, too everything so he jams his lips against Hinata's in what he imagines is the worst kiss on human record. It's over before it even begins, but he still comes away wild-eyed and flushed, his mind blown wide open.

Hinata blinks at him, his lips parted. "Sooooo, we need to, you know, try that again later. If you want," he adds quickly, and smiles his bright, sunny Hinata smile, which turns into his loud, crazy Hinata laugh. "I bet I'm way better at kissing than you are, Kageyama."

***

They both suck at kissing, but that's what practice is for.

**Author's Note:**

> this story is so stupid, I'm sorry sobs in hands (regardless, I hope you...enjoyed it!)


End file.
